but why?

i just don’t understand…i don’t.

why…why…why when i say…and i’ve said awhile now that i wanna leave ohio…wanna go…leave it a trail of dust blowing behind my heels…then why do people still say, “here’s this job i want you to check out.” and i smile, hopeful-like and find out that it’s in freakin ohio. when i say…when i declare that i want to relocate…why? what is this phenomenon and why don’t they take me serious?

and i say, “i don’t like ohio. it’s too conservative. it’s not for me. nothing has ever worked here for me.” and they say, “yeah, ohio pretty much blows. the job market is jacked all over the place but ohio and michigan have been hit really really hard. and yeah, ohio really sucks. but here’s a job posting.”

who is the person that’ll be like, “eff ohio. here’s something from ___________” ?

i don’t get it…i don’t.

cities cities cities & me

ok…so the storm begins where before i was calm and slightly elated that my company’s outsourcing would be my initial kick to get out of this city (yes, columbus, ohio), i’m falling into a bit of a funk and frenzy. my time is short and i’m torn. i have to make this leap, and i’m afraid. i have to go…but i just don’t know where.

i have approximately a month to do some pretty major things. they are:
convince / coax someone i’m hireable holding a master of science degree…
meet someone who can get me in…my last ditch chance was a contact at columbia…haven’t heard back after sophisticated yet almost begging check in…
or just…(gasp)
pack my car with my movies. music. computer. and…drive.
this all seemed so cinematic before…reality has put the fear into this girl.

however, i do have a more narrow idea of where i want to go…with the help and essay driven questions and answers from and of a few friends. research. salary / cost of living calculators and many many many polls.

here’s the list:
new york city/brooklyn/or even jersey – pros…everything! cons…soooooooo expensive

los angeles – pros…city, sun, opportunity and my love for film…cons soooo expensive and the cost to drive it would be close to what??? right!

las vegas or phoenix…pros…sun / cons…too far a drive…again

jacksonville, fl – A STRONG CONTENDER for job opportunities, sun and beach. (leaning towards this area because it’s still seemingly doable and risky enough)

atlanta, ga – pros…would love a cnn gig…

raleigh/durham/cary, nc – pros…my dream team has done wonderful at convincing me. both i ultra respect as high as could be and still A STRONG CONTENDER…cons…i want a fast fast city setting. but then again, there’s the dream team.

washington, dc – pros…opportunities galore, my love for politics. cons…sooooo expensive.

so…that is what is going right now. my job expected to be outsourced to india in about 30 days…after which…i plan to … move. um…somewhere.

wish me luck…send me some suggestions. and uh…i am seeking anything, boasting experience in HR and writing…but not limited to such.

everything may be wrong

i had a revelation the other day…everything may be wrong with my job search. i am going to explain it like this…my current search has been primarily for hr positions in city x, y, and/or z. but why am i searching for an hr position while my passion is writing? why am i only focusing on hr when i complain…all the time about the confines of corporate america? why then am i settling for something that doesn’t captivate my joy? why am i settling for less than what i want? and why am i semi-searching for writing jobs, while i have many other passions?

sometimes we get tricked into thinking that our goal has one road…when in actually there are many routes to success. don’t forget this.

i was operating under the idea that my road for a job change and locale…had a lineal road. not true because there are many avenues we can take to get there. from reading various stories and articles about successful people, i’ve learned that goals, dreams, aspirations and answers…such as life…is way too wildly various. so why can’t our paths be wildly various as well?

i’ve newly learned what it means to never stop. to always be ready to change, ready for change and be willing to fix or alter the process. if you land at failure…keep going…don’t stop there because you’ll end up cheating yourself.

and if i may get spiritual for a minute…i was thinking…is God not allowing this for me because it just truly isn’t me? it won’t bring me the joy i want? it’s not where i need to be? He has something better? for i’ve tried and tried and tried…nothing’s working. maybe my focus is off.

if something isn’t working…immediately try something different…and maybe at some point keep trying that old thing…just in case.

with me, sure, i’ll stay on jobfox, monster and careerbuilder. i will continue to look at company profiles and make contacts. but i will also try many other industries that i am interested in. we are more faceted in more than we sometimes realize.

sometimes all appears to be lost…when winning is just around the corner.

indecision 2007/08

i have a friend from brooklyn who won’t let me forget brooklyn. so, i’m thinking about brooklyn…when she talks about it…it is like her eyes glaze over. so every now and then she’ll send a bit of housing info…even though she doesn’t live there herself.

then enters…

my indecision 2007/08

where do i want to go?
(this said while listening to jamiroquai’s song “planet home”)
“there’s no place like planet home
i want to go now
if only we could make it right”

well i know my planet, but i get a little antsy about the cities within the continent, more specifically in the united states in which i currently reside-but that could change also.

so, i also have a friend who is contemplating a move to boston, interviewing and everything. “i could take you with me” they say.

but i don’t wanna do boston…again.

so, i took this quiz from the web site:

http://www.bestplaces.net/fybp/

here’s what it offered me. i had to limit the list to 30 while it gave me hundreds:

interestingly enough … COLUMBUS ranked #123.
and a secret fascination for me…MIAMI at an eager #32

1 . San Francisco , CA (see San Francisco, CA)
Econ.–C, Housing–C, Educ.–A-, Health–A
Crime–C+ Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A+

2 . Boston , MA-NH-ME (see Boston, MA)
Econ.–C+, Housing–C, Educ.–A, Health–A
Crime–B Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A+

3 . Los Angeles-Long Beach , CA (see Los Angeles, CA)
Econ.–C, Housing–C+, Educ.–B, Health–B
Crime–C+ Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A+

4 . Washington , DC-MD-VA-WV (see Washington, DC)
Econ.–C, Housing–C+, Educ.–A, Health–A
Crime–C+ Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A+

5 . New York , NY (see New York, NY)
Econ.–C-, Housing–C, Educ.–B+, Health–B+
Crime–C+ Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A+

6 . Long Island , NY (see Long Island, NY)
Econ.–C, Housing–C, Educ.–A, Health–A-
Crime–A+ Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–B+

7 . Minneapolis-St. Paul , MN-WI (see Minneapolis, MN)
Econ.–B, Housing–C+, Educ.–A-, Health–A-
Crime–C+ Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A

8 . Chicago , IL (see Chicago, IL)
Econ.–C+, Housing–C+, Educ.–B+, Health–B+
Crime–C- Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A+

9 . Newark , NJ (see Newark, NJ)
Econ.–C+, Housing–C, Educ.–B+, Health–B+
Crime–C+ Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A+

10 . Stamford-Norwalk , CT (see Stamford, CT)
Econ.–C+, Housing–C, Educ.–B+, Health–B
Crime–A Rec.–A+, Culture–A+, Trans.–A+

the sick part of this is that two days or two hours from now…i’ll waver again. why didn’t phoenix pop up, where’s vegas. i’ve thought about vegas. um.

aye. indecision is so not sexy.